I just spent 17 minutes trying to write an email to her husband... I ended up hitting cancel because I just couldn't do it. I wanted to make her happy and comfort him, but I just can't. I can't even trust him let alone open up a little to him... I wonder if he feels the same way despite his seeming "macho" attitude... I never understood guys like thaat so I don't know but I am sure it still applies to him also, one of us will have to give. I will give it more time and see what happens.
Ugh. Why is it that when I wake up from a long sleep I am tired. I get an average sleep like a normal person and I want more but when I wake up from one of my half hour naps I am ready to go and feel amazing. I had a nice sleep and when I woke up my mistress was going to bed. As soon as she logged off I became exhausted. THis happens all the time, when she is asleep and away I lose all will to stay awake. I have a bass guitar at the end of my couch that keeps calling me but all I can do is long for her and desire sleep until she returns... I really am a pet... almost every ffabric of my being is tied to her.
Few people aprove of what I am doing and they warn me... I even got a death threat and I don't believe it was enpty. However I am more vicious than the person who made the threat upon my mistress and everyone at the table with me said they would kill him with me. He said he wouldn't and asked now what if she dies accidentally? He looked scared when I said that it would be an unfortunate misunderstanding for him :) Oh friends... how messed up they are.
Regardless of what anyone says I am going... I will give all of myself to her for the rest of my life. I had best go work is approaching and I nwill just ramble forever about nothing. I will write back later to tell you how my first day on the floor went. I would be nervouse if I wasn't so tired...I got 8 hours this makes no sense.
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