I wish I could take it all back. That period of time where I wounded my lover. I'm sitting here as the sun rises. Having only gotten 4 hours sleep in these last two days and all I can think of is the damage I've done and how quickly she's forgiven me... I'm so very lucky to have her... I should have nevver hurt her to begin with.
I need to try harder to fight these urges and impulses. She of all people doesn't deserve the kind of pain that I brought. There is nothing I can do to make up for it but I'm going to keep trying. I refuse to sleep until this immigration paperwork is done. I'm nearly done of pictures then it's just printing skype conversations and rechecking emails. Oh and after reciepts and making sure things are in order. I think most of that can be done before sleep... it has to be. It won't make up for what I've done but I really need that girl here with me now more than ever and I've dawdled long enough. No more playing around with little flames. I aim to ignite the earth.
She's mine, and I'm not renting her to anyone, especially the US of A
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