That should be the name of a book and I should write it once this is all said and done and I'm a crazy old lady. Today has been a day of Mania on and off. Being Bipolar Type 2 I experience shorter bursts of Mania than someone who is type 1, this can be frustrating but today I reached a new level of mania, it was... like sex (this blog is going to get explicit from here) Hypersexuality is a huge problem for me when I am manic, it can make me feel like a total degenerate whore which usually after thinking this I end up filleting my arm as punishment for being a worthless slut for having such intense urges for things a married women in a monogymous relationship should not have. This time I didn't, this time I got a call.. ohh what a DELIGHTFUL call it was.
Without giving too much detail I was speaking to an unreasonable chap who was having technical issues. He was angry, oh so amazingly angry and upset. He kept his cool somewhat with small outbursts. He was like watching a volcano spouting bits of fire here and there just waiting for it to erupt into a full blown firestorm. It was delightful (I use that word alot) As the call went on and he got more and more upset he started bleeding from his surgery which made him more whiney and upset, which only made me more enthralled and heightened my euphoric state. I listened to him yell and cry and complain about the most absurd things. He was so incredibly unreasonable even when I offered to send someone to fix his problem so he didn't bleed out he yelled at an overnight wait. He was a gem and I wanted the time we spent together to go on. Merited I couldn't deal with this in person I think I would be scared he would hurt me... then again perhapse I wouldn't I feel pretty fucking invincible right now. Don't get me wrong I help people and I am compassionate to those who deserve it but oh my goodness it's a treat when the unreasonable decide to cross my path. THe people who think the world is theirs and that I should lick their boot. To teach them who actually owns the world and who should lick who's boot is truly a delicacy. To watch them suffer like a child and expect me to take their abuse. I could go on forever about the feeling of this scenario but I will spare you my oh so silent Blog Maybe I should just look into being some kind of dominatrix... though I could only do it when I'm manic haha!
I'm currently writing the digits of Pi on my arm as a lack of things to do I'll post how many numbers I got to later it gives me something to do and to put my mind on.
Anyway I'm done blogging I have things to do and such. It's been a slice taking about my crazy moments. Can't wait to see how this night unfolds. This is so much better than how I've been feeling. I'm probably going to suffer a huge crash but WHATEVER!!!!!
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